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I’ve been reading a few blogs that include recipes (The Pioneer Woman especially) and been thinking about doing a bit of that myself. However, given how various and sundry allergies and food sensitivities make my culinary repertoire pretty boring – well, except for my garlic salmon which kicks arse – I decided to approach this in a slightly different way.

Remember Two Fat Ladies (opening sequence here – love that song)? It was a fantastic cooking show starring Jennifer Patterson and Clarissa Dickson Wright and was dedicated to taste and not skimping on ingredients. ‘Less is more’ was not the ladies’ approach – like my father, they believed that more is better. This recipe is from one of their cookbooks, Two Fat Ladies – Full Throttle (p.101), contributed by Jennifer Patterson.

Penis Stew

This unusual stew was sent to me by Joan Saunders and her twin sister, but originates from Marcelle Thomal whose grandfather was an orthodox Russian rabbi. His grandmother’s cookery books have been handed down to him and, as he remarked, this receipt makes a change from insect ones. Not for the squeamish.

450g/1lb of penis, ram’s or bull’s
3 tbsp oil
1 onion, chopped
2 cloves of garlic, peeled and chopped
1 tsp coriander seeds, crushed
1 large tomato, chopped
freshly ground black pepper
1 tsp cumin seeds, crushed
1 tsp salt

Scald the penis, drain and clean it. Place in a saucepan, cover with cold water, bring to the boil, remove and scum and simmer for 10 minutes. Drain and slice. Heat the oil in a large frying pan, add the onion, garlic and coriander and fry until the onion is golden. Add the penis slices and fry on both sides for a few minutes. Stir in the remaining ingredients with a good grinding of pepper, add enough water to cover and bring to the boil. Lower the heat, cover and simmer for about 2 hours or until tender. Add a little water from time to time if necessary to prevent burning.

Many thanks to DavidG for the transcription.