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The Ice Age Cometh

Bitter.

Resentful.

I just want to cry.

These are words and phrases used in conversations with friends, acquaintances and total strangers when talking about Toronto’s weather in the past couple weeks.

Because it’s cold. Really, really cold. 470 degrees (at least) below average for this time of year. But why would October be any different? All year, it’s been like this, most of the summer was like that and that’s one of the things that makes it even harder to take. Because we had maybe four weeks of real Toronto summer, the kind where you gad about in light summer dresses, keep the fans going and bitch about the humidity. Except this year, nobody bitched, mostly because we spent May, June, July and the first half of August bitching about it not being warm. And in the third week of September the temps dipped again and by now, it’s as cold as it normally is in November and we haven’t had that week in October that we almost always have that feels like summer all over again, except with yellowing leaves dancing in the warm air and yesterday, they said it might snow. I’ve been in Canada for 27 years and I’m pretty sure I don’t remember ever having seen the possibility of snow before Halloween. Okay, logic says it may have happened once or twice, but I don’t remember it.

And did I mention I’m wearing socks and have been for two weeks now? Not only was it a month later than it normally is when I took them off, but now it’s a month earlier than it normally is putting them back on and my feet would like you to know that they are deeply unhappy. Well, not deeply unhappy with being warm(ish), but they do have that claustrophobia issue and the thought that it is going to be at least seven months – SEVEN! MONTHS!! – before there is slightest hope that I can take them off again and walk around with bare feet is enough to make me want to cry.

And it’s not just me. It’s everyone I know. When you live in Canada, you may not like winter, we may complain bitterly in February, but once it gets a bit colder in November, it’s noteworthy, something to chitchat about, but under normal circumstances, it’s not something to resent with a burning fervour. It’s expected and once it gets cold and snowy in December, is actually sort of nice, adds to the whole seasonal joy and happiness. But this cold? In October? After a shitty summer and last year’s neverending winter and the summer before that that was really wet? It turns out that Canadians – or to be more specific, Torontonians – suck up the usual seven months of cold only because we’ve had four glorious months of warmth to heal the wounds of the previous winter. This year, we had four weeks of summer and I’m pretty sure that the February blahs are going to arrive on or about November 14th.

The phrase temper tantrum does not begin to describe how I feel….

Bitterness and shivering aside, I’m also excited about Laurie’s rescheduled Toronto booklaunch and hope to meet a few friends for the first time there (y’know… barring illnesses and misc acts of various divinities):

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